Feb 29, 2012

thoughts of today

The most boring time of my life. Except this vacation I've had a friend with allmost all the time.
And I really need some rest.
Talking 2 weeks on a row just about my problems got me pretty exhausted.
Believe not as easy as it sounds but it will really make u feel better. Now I know when this all started.
'And why I even have all these problems. But hey I'm pretty happy.
My dream is going fast the way it should.
I just wrote a new song called Frozen rose.
I think I did a pretty good job. Now I'll just need to wait that our singer gets out...
Somethings just do happen them selves. Some don't. That is just how it is.

 Spell calls
I have learned a lot about spells. I have started to really believe in magic.
I really am believeing in witches. But not at werewolves.
There is something what I still think are really just stories
I do believe in fairies as the guardinans of the elements.
I don't believe that everyone can be witches, werewolves or vampires.
I dont bealieve that anyone has ever seen a real vampire.
I believe that some this ability runs in the family and some have this as a calling.
I think werewolves don't exsist. And  vampires are not humans.
I think that any of  us  could have the possibility to be a witch.
Ofcourse everyone cant have it.
Spells and magic attract me very much.
It begin when I was 11 years old.
I saw a ghost.  And I've seen them eversince.
Now I am learning to be a full witch.

Lost in nature
I have suddenly felt wierd preciation when I walk in forest.
I honor the old trees. They have seen a lot in this worl over time.
I miserable when I think someday all these majestic trees are gone.
The are like an old wise humans who tell me stories.
Wind signs the most beautiful lullabies.
Animals show how we should preciate this nature.
Without them there wouldn't be us.
Don't believe me, go even once. in the middle of the night, outside just to look at the sky.
Maybe it will hit you too, like it hitted me.<3  

Feb 25, 2012

Everything is okay if we do this together.

I have been thinking alot lately. About life and the positive sides of it.
Everything is not as bad as it seems.
You all know about my depression and it takes a lot to go through everyday.
But now even I know everything has a positive side.
I have gone trough a lot. I don't say that I have gone through more that maybe you have.
It sound korny to say "" Everything is going to be okay.." And it is not true.
You need to find the strongness in you. I havent find mine yet.
I still believe I have it in somewhere in me.
Everything is not okay of course.
If youre parent die it is not okay ever, still it has a positive side. 
It will help you grow. Even though I know it sounds awful to think that way but it is true.
(My parents do live)

 I cant say I really know how everything works and how does everything feel.
And I will never be able to know that. But I really try to learn as much as I cant in this boulevard of life.
I wont be able to make this world better. Nobody can do it alone.
We CAN NOT do it alone. But if we get together and listen all the people in this world who have hard time. (I mean the whole world). We should concentrate on the youngs of this world. They will be the future of this world someday. They will make this world go in the better way.

All who think this life it is not worth living. Don't think that it will change after you die. You understand what it feels like to be hurt. So you should teach it to other people. We all should be together in this and think why this world goes this way. Nowadays teens (even me) are cruel. We make everyone else feel bad cause we feel bad inside. WAKE UP! Anything will not change if you hurt others! IT IS WRONG IN EVERYWAY!
Who gets happy for someone saying ""You are an ugly bitch" "You are worthless, fat and awfull" Trust me and the life nobody does feel better after it. Not the one who hears it or the one who says it. Cruellness will not change anything. You don't need to be like "I will think how everyone else feels but not me" That is not right either. I'm scared to say these things but I hope something even a little thing will change when you even try to understand how it hurts.    
This is just the way I think. I can't say that I'm right on this one. You ll have your own opinions. That is how it should be. We should preciate all the differences in us. If you don't like something about yourself, cange it. If somebody else don't like something about you then they are not worth of you. We all are the same humanity.
We all have our needs and dreams and likes. But we can't say that is wrong to like something you don't. Be yourself and show what you like. Don't care about those who don't like it. They like something what you don't like. That is the truth. 
I hope you this made you think a bit.
 Have a nice day. I hope that you leave this page in better contidicion than you came.
C ya later!

Feb 22, 2012

Poems and Ville Valo just save my life!

Hey guys! 
For some reason I have been really sad for few days.
I don't even know why, but I feel so lonely.
I need some on eto be there for me.
Hold me and say that Im me and I dont need to change at all.
I feel like no-one understands me truly.
I feel like cant erase the words so the reality grows.
I wish I died,
On that right by your side,
So just kill me now and let the good times roll.
I feel like this. ^ I can't help it. My life just seems to hate me.
It is like when love and death embrace.
Simple poem <3
Cold days and loving nights.
I feel like I'm burning inside.
I feels so cold, the reapers hands.
Will love ever last?
My heart is ice and soul lies in hell.
Why this is something so hard to tell.
Wings on my back are red of blood.
They shot me down from my god.
Im pretending that sorrow is not here.
It is over there, I say and tell.
Sharp pieces of the lies cut my eye.
It burns and hurts.
Salt in my wounds, my feelings burst.
Kill me slowly, Kill me fast.
The joy of yours will never last.
I wrote you a letter thinking your life could be better.
But no, you will be in hell with me forever.
You'll die in fever and join me in my pain
Here is just something that I wrote. Did not even take a long time to make that.

Blog ya later. Love ya all! 

Feb 17, 2012

I really got exited about these.

I really like doing these. Even if I dont use so much time. So these are not the best ones I've made.
Blogger wont let me but them in here.
Sooo. First one is a fanvid about Ville Valo! <33
And secong one is about Marco Hietala!
Two finnish men who have chaged the history for good.
They both have amaizing voices and playing instrumet skills.

Feb 14, 2012

This is for you Henry!

Happy Valenites-day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Valentines-day to all of youuuuu!! <333333
Here is my few videos I made just for this day. <33
I hope that people could see them and see that I really do care about my friends!
Specially my BFF! and BF<33333
Here you gooo!!


Feb 12, 2012

TWICE?! lets seee...

Hey guys 
I'm thinking that I should  blog more often..
I think I'll maybe blog twice a day?!!?!!!
Yep. I said it..
Well I f I'll get my own laptop then I will.
So. Me and Senni are in my place. 
She is playing and I'm writing..

'Do you guys feel yourself sometimes so worth of something?
I don't feel it often but now I do.
Makes me smile :3
(and no my smile does not look like a cat face)

I sooooooo booooreeeeed......
 I think we should go to eat some breakfast. 

I love my latest video so much I diceded to make another one..
It comes on valentines day.
Im making it even more special that it already is..
And If you dont have a boy/girlfriend
Don't let it put you down..
Be with your bff of with your sister of brother.
Juast dont be alone..
I'll be with "my" computer and  refrigerator ;D Haha.
I'll be with my buddies and so should u!! <3


Feb 11, 2012

Saturday. z Z z Z z Z

Here I am..
Im trying to blog something without any idea that what I should write.
Well Senni is in here. VWe are having a sleepover at my place
and Im really soon falling asleep :D
We are having fun. or thats what I think :D
I need to "thank"  again my frind Datafox~ 
All the time im just trying to make my life go straight ahead
Nothing seems to be working.
Well atleast my birthday is coming soon.. Welll...
Soon and soon.. It is 19/3...
I reaaly hope for just three things on my birthday.
1. My own laptop
2: Gift card to cybershop 
3. Henry in Tampere
 All I wish for..

My eyes are getting really twirly and stuff so I need to go sleeping...
I tell you just one thing before I go.

Blog ya later homies! <333333333